an open letter

I would like to give all of the people who wear their misunderstandings of real world problems, and complete ignorance of facts as a badge of honor, a big hi-five. Congrats! No, seriously - thank you - with out you we could have never gotten this far. Who would have known that you could have done so much for this great country of ours, just by your mild commitment to Christ, and your absolute disgust for gays!
I remember the good old days when young republicans would often quietly wear maroon sweater vests sitting in the quad babbling on about the left wing and Jew driven media machine all to themselves. Right next to you were the equally avoidable Christian kids. The Christian males would often strum three chord acoustic masterpieces on the guitar with their mint colored Hawaiian shirts, open toe sandals (Lord Boards) as their off-white puka shells glistened in the sun. Christian girls would sip on Dr. Pepper while they made banners for school functions in their mom-like cut jean dresses.
I do not believe that it was mere coincidence that we barely spoke. It might have been my apparent distaste for outfits purchased at the Gap, or my void of colorful clothes and school cheer. Or maybe it was my whimsical way of depicting the bureaucratic order of high school law as fascism in its purist form.
Either way, aside from our complete disregard for organized sports in the form of 4th period Physical Education, we had nothing in common. Our unspoken agreement to never cross each-others path, (on school grounds, or any other social function) proved to work well for us. We both wanted to do our time peacefully, so we can get out and never have to hear from one another again. You to your ivy league school and me to a life of wondering what I could have been, if I had only read more than cliff notes.
Oh, how wrong we were.
I am not sure what year in college the young republicans and Christian kids decided to have an orgy with pop culture. But their bastard love child has spawned as quickly as Gizmo produces more gremlins when he touches water. And yes, somebody fed them after midnight.
Hidden in ‘leftists’ sub-culture attire, flooding rock concerts, lounging at Starbucks drinking $6.45 lattes - they are as deceptive as an undercover operative in the clandestine division. They are preying on small talk and casual conversation, like a lioness patiently waiting to attack baby water buffalo, for their chance to shift a “nice day” remark into a full-scale war of political debate.
Like a counter culture double agent they are there lurking in the dark.
I know that the immoral and repulsive act of homosexuality makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up and your stomach churn as if you downed a gallon of ex-lax. Even though the back-ally, coat hanger days have been replaced with sterile, private clinics, I know abortion makes you cringe.
And that’s fine. That is your right to clench your fists and wave them in the air, screaming your opinions over a bull horn, holding a sign saying “god hates ____(fill in the blank).”. Just as it is some ones right to be gay, or to make choices about their own bodies and their reproductive rights.
In the past, your voting record has been solely based on crushing the hopes of every rainbow flag toting man and woman in America by restricting their ability to publicly (and legally) commit to their love to one another.
Again, that is your right to do so.
No, I am not going to bring up the fact that religious freedom (that and paying taxes to some unseen, unchecked power?!?!) was one of the main motivations for our founding fathers to fight and kill for the separation of church and state. And I won’t mention how utilizing the fear of a nation as leverage to slowly erode the bill of rights (whether that was the intent or not) can be looked upon as the beginning of the end for true democracy.
I am not even sure that I will mention the piss poor management skills from the upper tier untouchables has led us into an illegal war, a failed economy and a debt almost as large as the ego from which it was conceived.
I will, however, mention that your belief in god, whichever way you choose to believe (or not to), does not necessarily equate to one political parties allegiance. You do not need to vote as a republican because you are Christian. In fact, voting for ‘stalemate’ issues, such as abortion and gay rights, may not be the best method to achieve an affluent society.
For all the peace loving, bleeding heart, save the animals, what the hell does economics have anything to do with my communal flower garden?, liberals – this goes for you as well.
Since, our plan to avoid each other at all costs turned out to be a pipe dream, and that we actually do have to co-exist, lets please try to find some common ground.
That common ground can be a pledge. An oath, that regardless of our financial, political, and ethnic backgrounds, we will take time to learn about the candidate we are voting for (and not voting for). To ask tough questions like; will this person better our country? Will they uphold the constitution? Did they get grandfathered in as heir to their previous position as CEO to the multi-national corporation that fast tracked to chapter 7 bankruptcy filings once they took over? Do they have the experience to run the most powerful nation on earth? Simple really. To realize that no matter what side of the argument you are on, our country is on the verge of collapse, and that we can make a difference -if we only pick up a fucking newspaper and read.